Accomplishments do not determine a person's value

Yesterday - 2 amazing things happened. 

1) ASA won first place in Booth.  Congratulations to 2012 ASA board on a great job! This was really good news - cuz we've got 2nd place the last two years. I wasn't in Pittsburgh this year, but I called them before and after the ceremony - so it kinda felt like I was there. 

2) Later that night - I attended the Art Center Grad Show in Pasadena. Couple of my friends were gradating - and I saw a lot of familiar faces from my ACCD Saturday High classes.

Booth and Art Center. Two of the most monumental times of my life on the same time. 

A lot of people asked me why I didn't go back to Pittsburgh this year. I'm not really sure what was the reason - but I really wanted to stay away. I've worked on Booth for the last 5 years - even when I went back as an alumni! I think I want to know that I can feel worthy and good about myself without "Booth," and having strangers acknowledging me "Booth God." Sure it feels great while you are there - but man, fame goes burns out quicker than a candle's flame. Booth was a great part of my past, but it's time that I move on.

When I was at the Art Center grad show - I was bombarded was all this positive energy and inspiration from all the great work. Seeing my friend's work on the wall reminded me that ... hey I can do it too. 

I'll cut to the point. In the next 2-3 months - you will see an explosion of work. My improvement is going to be unbelievable and the work I'll put out is going to be fucking amazing.  I've been holding back - thinking that I wasn't good enough. I know how to get good - it's not a question of if.. just a matter of when. By my 24th birthday - August 1st - I will be working a full-time studio job as a concept artist - or I will die trying (that's an expression). lol

Lastly, I want to keep in mind that my accomplishments do not determine my value as a person. I used to place a very heavy emphasis on that.  When I did Booth - I was happy and I felt like a winner if we got first place - but I would feel like a failure and sulked for the whole year if we got 2nd. Same thing at Art Center, I would judge people based on the quality of the work. That was the mentality I used to have. 

I am not currently working at a studio job right now, nor do I think my work is at a level that I consider "industry standard."  However, I accept where I am right now in my life. I have control over how hard I work, what my portfolio looks like and how many companies I send my portfolio to. I do NOT have control over whether or not a company will hire me. And I will NOT let someone else determine my value as a person. I will NOT let the quality of my work determine my value as a person. And... even if I do end up getting a great job and make a lot of money, I will NOT let myself be arrogant and think that I am better than other people whose work is not as good as mine. 

Signed - Chris Chien